finally knowing...

After four extremely long weeks, we finally know where we are moving next. 

San we come!!!

You know what's funny? Finally knowing where we are going did little to squash the anxiety attacks I have recently developed. It may have actually heightened them a bit as I now face a thousand tiny checklists of things to do, people to visit and items to sell all within the next six weeks (give or take a few days). I had hoped that just knowing where we were going would help calm my overactive mind, but that has not been the case and I find myself again in uncharted waters. 

We don't know how long we will be in California. We estimate anywhere from 1-3 years depending on the economy. I know this sounds crazy to most people, but we really do want to make Milwaukee our home and we do not expect to become permanent west coast citizens. When I tell people we have a choice to stay in California or possibly return to Wisconsin, most people laugh and say, "Well, stay in California. Why would you want to come back here where the winters are so long?" I don't ever know what to say to those people except that I have loved it here and honestly hope we can call this place our home soon. 

Enough with all the sentimental Milwaukee nonsense...I think you all know where my heart lies. We will come back here. I just know it. 

But for the time being, I am busy securing housing and checking out schools for Mya. I am very excited to live near my family. I know this may be the only time in my married life I will live this close to them. And while snow doesn't really bother me, I am also anticipating warmer days year round. San Diego seems like a dream place. I can't really believe we are about to embark on this crazy journey thousands of miles away, but I think it is the right place for our family right now. 

I am sorry I have been so lame about blogging lately. Even as I write this post I think "ack...this sounds so dumb" but I feel so tired and overwhelmed with all that I have to do that my brain doesn't quite have its full working capacity running at the moment. I can't even tell you what the last four weeks did to my brain, my waistline and my wallet. Everyday not knowing and receiving little to no communication about the impending future really toyed with me. I found myself buying things for my wardrobe or the house just because. I hoped those things would bury my worries, but they didn't. 

I have vowed not to buy anything for myself in the month of May (except I recently had to purchase a new phone because I cracked the screen so terribly on my old one). I am going to start checking things off my list tomorrow and the next day and the next. I do hope my girls cooperate with me so I can start sorting through all the piles I've left unattended throughout the house. Wish me luck!

1 comment :

  1. I'm so excited that you'll be in CA but I am right there with you, I'd never want to end up there forever. It will be a fun adventure and San Diego is beautiful. In fact, if I HAD to live in CA for the rest of my life, I would choose SD. Yay for not feeling like you're in limbo anymore!


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