women need women

It has come to my attention throughout my thirty years that women need women. I have met an assortment of women ranging from the most stubborn tomboy to the most dainty female and while some hate to admit it, women need women. 

No where on this planet can a woman receive the needed amount of validation or support than from someone who houses similar hormones and feelings. Men can compete, and some even do fairly well when it comes to lending a listening ear (mine falls in this category), but in the end, women need women. 

Last week I found myself sitting across from one of my dearest friends as we munched on a rather delicious Italian salad, and I listened to her heart. I didn't offer much advice because in truth, I didn't have much to offer, but I listened to her. When she finished, I told her how much I understood everything she was experiencing and I told her she was not alone. Because let's be honest, she's not. She is like so many women I meet these days who struggle to do all that is required without letting all the proverbial crap hit the fan. 

I am so happy I could listen to her that night in the blazing Arizona heat. I am so glad she listened to me. It's as if our hearts connected and no judgment was passed, only love and understanding. 

Women have a lot on their tables. No one woman is the same. No one woman should be treated the same as another. It's as if we all have one hundred glass plates spinning on tiny, little rods, and all day we are trying to keep the plates from toppling over and crashing down into a million pieces. No one wants the plates to crash because that just means more mess to clean up at the end of the day. And when you are in the thick of things, one more mess just might do you in. 

Some women struggle with time or the lack thereof. Some women struggle with motivation. Some women struggle with body image issues. Some women struggle with motherhood. Some women struggle with anxiety. Some women struggle with depression. Some women struggle with abuse. Some women struggle with loneliness. Some women struggle with silence. 

To our core, we want to be the very best at everything we put our mind to, but therein lies our problem. When we aren't the very best, what then? And what if we are dealing with any or all of the aforementioned problems, are we less of a person? And what if our struggles make us angry, who will listen? Who will understand that anger? And what if that anger turns to resentment? It is a vicious cycle. One that should not be dealt with alone. 

So here is my plea to all my female readers, please be good to yourself. Be patient. If a plate falls, let it fall. Get angry about it if you have to, but take the necessary steps to clean up your mess, even if it takes some time. Be kind to the girl you don't understand. Don't judge. Listen with your heart. 

And men, you can keep giving us logical answers. If we don't like them, we'll just store them in our back pockets and pretend we didn't hear you just to pull out your solution a few days later and pretend we thought of it ourselves. But you too should try to listen with your heart. Pretend you understand what it's like to have one hundred million hormones testing every ounce of your patience. Pretend you know what post-partum depression is like and how hard it hurts. Pretend you understand the reason why we so desperately want to be better than we are but can't figure out how to do it. The more you listen with your hearts, the more we will love you. I promise. 


"Be kind and considerate with your criticism... It's just as hard to write a bad book as it is to write a good book." Malcolm Cowley