10 things

1. It was 80 degrees today, and it's March 14th. I'd clap my hands loudly, except I know it's an ominous sign that we're in for a really hot summer.
2. I spent nearly 8 hours this weekend sorting through 8 bins of tiny girl clothes, breathing them in and rubbing material on my cheeks in an effort to memorize the way I felt when my girls wore certain things. There were a few items that were separated from the rest, and those items will wait patiently for the day when one of my girls has a girl of her own to dress and make beautiful. I had tried to sort the clothes during Christmas break, but the task proved to be too much for my mother heart, and I shoved all the bins back in the closet until this weekend when I realized the baby boy would be coming in 9 short weeks, and he deserved some space too. I left him just a sliver of the closet, you know, as women are allowed to do. ;)
3. Not two seconds ago did I scream, "Get in your beds now!!" for the fifth time tonight to girls who refuse to sleep. You should know that I try to be a fairly level-headed mother, but when you encroach on my time alone at night...beware. BEWARE. How's that for a healthy dose of reality?
4. Last week was Mya and Genevieve's spring break, and as luck would have it, it rained the whole time. Like crazy rain, not just a little spray here and there, so I was forced to put on my best face and find as many in-home activities I could find. We made robots out of cereal boxes, animals out of pipe cleaners, forts out of blankets, and odd shapes out of chocolate chips. We barely survived, and my body is still reeling from the lack of napping it received.
5. I am really hating politics right now; well, politics and Facebook. Facebook is a not so gentle reminder of how divided a nation we are, and it scares the hell out of me.
6. And on the vein of politics (because I don't plan on mentioning anything else here on this blog again because it's too public a forum), I cannot agree with or endorse any person who is an obvious racist and promotes violence. I fear that people who side with such people will be all too sad when they wake up in a not-so-distant future to a society without civilization.
7. Baby boy is growing at a rapid rate. I feel him with every move I make. He loves fruits and vegetables and hates milk/dairy. He doesn't seem to like spicy or fried foods either. His pregnancy is one full of sandwiches and salads. And yet, he is still my biggest baby by far. He's probably going to be 10 lbs., and I don't think I'm going to bounce back from that. He's come shooting out and leave me and my lifeless body lying there on that hospital bed.
8. I'm itching to move. Being in Philadelphia reminded me how much I love being close to a city.
9. I need to print pictures. Genevieve was asked to take a picture of herself as a baby to school today, and as I searched the house in vain for a picture, I thought, "Well crap, I'm a terrible mother." I ended up robbing a picture frame of one of my most favorite pictures of her just so her teachers could staple it to their bulletin board (why the stapler?!! why?).
10. I've been a terrible funk the past few weeks. I had reasons to back up the funk, but when it came down to dealing with the issues, I caved and decided it was way easier to remain in a funk than deal with the issues because dealing with them meant potentially hurting other people and, therefore, causing myself more pain because of guilt. Guilt weighs me down and makes me sadder so I am still trying to weigh my options and will hopefully find a way to deal with everything without hurting anyone too deeply.

And that's life right now on this Monday night as I write to you from my bed under the ceiling fan that is only sort of cooling my hot, hot pregnant body.

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"Be kind and considerate with your criticism... It's just as hard to write a bad book as it is to write a good book." Malcolm Cowley