shaking out the kinks

It's been 7 days since school started for Mya and Genevieve, and just as I expected I miss them terribly come noon every single day. It is nearly impossible to entertain a 3 year old day in and day out, especially when I have a baby strapped to my chest and another clinging to my back, which is Felicity's preferred method of getting around the house these days. By noon I find myself glancing at the clock and wishing the hours would pass quickly.

Genevieve has done remarkably well in school; I figured she would, but her glowing confidence in herself has really surprised me. She already acts as if she's been going to school and riding the bus home for years. She has picked out each of her outfits, which are usually made up of some sort of stripe combination. She is ready at the door before anyone else, and she takes off running the moment the sliding door opens on the van at school. I had to remind her yesterday that mama still needs hugs. She gave me an extra large eye roll, but I pretend sniffled and she came rushing to my side to squeeze my shoulders.

Mya, on the other hand, has had a harder time transitioning back to school. She hasn't said much about her teacher (she absolutely adored her 1st grade teacher and talked to me about her every day last year as soon as she got off the bus), she hasn't been clicking with friends at recess, she isn't a huge fan of what I serve her for lunch, and she hasn't liked the bus ride home at all, which was her favorite thing last year. Yesterday she came running into my room when she got home and sobbed into my bed sheet. I listened to her talk about the kids at recess, and my heart ached for her. Sometimes growing up can be so fun, but sometimes it can be so hard too. I hugged her tight and told her I loved her as sincerely as I could because I knew there were no appropriate words to "fix" her problem.

Lately I have been missing school. I have the itch to go back, which is completely ludicrous for my current situation, but oh how I love learning. Sometimes as I lie in bed at night, I make notes of what I would like to study if I am ever able to return to school. For now, I will be content with teaching the girls daily and learning with them. Just today I taught Elle about buoyancy (although I didn't even use that word), but we talked about why some things float and other's don't. I happened to fail this section of science while at BYU so it was fun to learn in kid language. We both learned and laughed as we raced our boats in the bathtub.

I hope things around here continue to shake out and school gets easier for Mya. I worry about her constantly. It amazes me how much my mind concerns itself with my children's happiness. But it does. I want them to experience life with all its ups and downs, but I want them to come out on top, knowing they've done all they could to learn and grow along the way.

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"Be kind and considerate with your criticism... It's just as hard to write a bad book as it is to write a good book." Malcolm Cowley