life lesson: the things that matter most

Someone recently asked me why I wasn't blogging as much as I was at the beginning of the year, and although I wanted to state one obvious reason of being pregnant and not feeling great most of the time, I decided to give her the real reason behind my decision to cut back on the whole blogosphere.

The blogging world, much like Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, etc., is highly addictive. Without paying attention to time, I would often spend several hours a day with my nose glued to this bright, electronic screen. I would read articles and posts when I should've been sitting on the floor rolling a ball back and forth with my curious baby. Or I would link from blog to blog to network with all these people who didn't know me nor did they care about me or my life just with a hope that they would return the favor and look at my blog. And some did, but most did not. Countless time was spent doing things that yes...mattered but shouldn't have mattered most.

I once wrote about an experience I had with Mya when she had repeatedly asked me to cuddle with her and I put off her request to finish writing some comments I felt were absolutely necessary to write at the time. I kept telling her "ten more minutes...five more minutes...one more minute" when in reality an hour had nearly passed. By the time I got up from this rickety old computer chair, she wasn't interested in me or in my love. The moment had passed. A part of me woke up that day.

I wondered why I cared so much about so many strangers' realities when I wasn't living in my own. I decided to rearrange my priorities and put a few other things in front of this blog of mine. I have been true to myself and my family ever since I made that commitment. Getting pregnant at the same time this decision was made definitely put a dent in my writing too. I can honestly admit that. I don't feel great at night and find it difficult to narrow in my thoughts after a long day with the peanuts. I am a much better writer in the morning, always have been.

A few months back I had a conversation with a lady I hardly knew about this very same subject. Struggling to stay above water, she confessed how many hours she spent texting, tweeting, Facebooking each day. The hour count is a little too embarrassing to share. Frustrated with her situation and her nagging children, I felt inspired to talk to her about my experience. I told her to put her phone up high during the morning hours when her time should be spent with her children and suggested that if she needed to look at all the status pages that she limited her time to ten minutes in the morning and ten minutes in the evening.

She just stared at me. The idea seemed foreign and out of question. I stared right back at her. I wasn't about to back down because I felt and still feel so strongly about this subject. I can't remember how much silence we endured before I just said simply, "Look, there are things that matter, things that matter a lot and things that matter most. Look at your life. What matters most?" The answer never came. I didn't expect it too.

I think the answer to that question will change as life changes, but it should always be at the forefront of our daily actions. With the exception of this past crazy month, my life has felt a lot less stressful because I constantly ask myself this question. Without a doubt, God comes first. My marriage second only to Him. And third, my children. Beyond those three things, I try to remember my family and friends. I serve others when possible. And I take care of myself too.

So if you ever wonder where I am, now you know. I am probably running through the sprinklers outside, sitting on the floor reading books, taking a nap, making dinner, sneaking a kiss with my husband and above all trying to get the most out of life. I don't want my kids to look back on their childhood and remember mom strapped to her phone or the computer. My mom never was; she was always with us whenever she could be.

I love the following video. My church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, creates these little three minute gems for the world to watch, and I just love this one. Even if you don't attend my church, I hope you'll take a minute to watch. It motivates me whenever I feel trapped by the vast alternate reality.