happiness





Remember when I said a few weeks back that I was working on being more optimistic? Well, on the whole, I'm succeeding. Feel free to clap.

This particular day had started out according to plan. I woke up on time without the assistance of V's early morning whimpering, jumped in the shower, got ready alone (a gift indeed), read from Luke 5 and helped the girls dress themselves for the day and off to school. We came home and I went to put Elle to sleep, but she refused to sleep. I left her in her crib for awhile, hoping she would succumb to sleep, but that didn't happen. She screamed louder and louder. I finally gave in and picked her up only to run upstairs to find V squeezing toothpaste all over my carpeted bathroom (who puts carpet in bathrooms anyways?).

I felt my skin get warm. Very warm. Too warm. I started to get upset with V, asking her why should do something like that?! Tim called right in the middle of things, and I ended up being short and angry with everything he was trying to say so I told him I needed to go. I believe I said, "I need to go have a good cry now. I'll talk to you later." I set Elle down next to V and let them play. I stepped over the blue-stained carpet and kneeled down in my closet. I said a very honest prayer and begged for some help just to make it through the afternoon. Almost immediately, I felt peace.

My mind was suddenly free and clear of all angry feelings, and I got up and cleaned up that toothpaste without a fuss. I brought the girls downstairs, turned on Christmas music and began to dance with the girls. I snapped these pictures while I was making lunch.

These girls really make my heart happy. Mya does too, but you know...she was at school.

I guess the reason I'm writing this memory down is because that toothpaste incident would've ruined my day a few months back. I would've thrown in the towel and growled my way through the rest of the day, but I didn't do it that time or the next time or the next time.

I'm choosing happiness--one step at a time.

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"Be kind and considerate with your criticism... It's just as hard to write a bad book as it is to write a good book." Malcolm Cowley