Comparing life to Matthew McConaughey's acting career.
I've had a lot on weighing on my mind lately. So many of my closest friends are burdened with some pretty heavy stuff at the moment. Each has her own different cross to bear, but every cross is heavy and awkward. As a friend, I am constantly thinking of ways to help mend their aching hearts.
I think my best thoughts when paper isn't readily available so bear with me as I jot down the ideas that came to me while showering this evening. At one point, I may or may not mention Matthew McConaughey, although you may be rolling your eyes at the moment, I'll try to bring everything full circle.
Tonight as I texted back and forth with one friend, she said something so pure and simple that I felt needed to be recorded. This kindred spirit of mine has had her share of ups and downs, ins and outs, and twists and turns. While reviewing her life as I've known it, I have often thought, "Man, she deserves a long break from pain. She has felt the slow burn of the refiner's fire all her life." But alas, her breaks are brief.
She is currently treading unchartered waters, and yet her head remains above the tossing waves. Although she is courageous and strong, she is like a child and is learning how to live an new, uncertain life. There are solutions to the problems she faces, and she knows it. But she recently learned from a wise acquaintance that perhaps she shouldn't jump to the obvious solutions too hastily because perhaps in doing so she might bulldoze the whole process. She was told to wait it out. To move slowly. To be open minded. To be patient.
As people, and dare I say more pointedly--as women, we are always searching for solutions to the issues we face. We talk and talk and talk ourselves and our loved ones to death in search of "the answer" to whatever we are dealing with. I am so guilty of this. Ask Tim. And generally, people freely offer suggestions or plausible solutions, and we grapple at them until the so-called problem goes away. Maybe we would be prudent to wait the situation out a little. Let it "ride out" as some say. Experience the pain that we so often try to escape.
And in doing so, we might become more understanding and empathetic to the world and people revolving around us.
This topic was ever present on my mind when I jumped in the shower. I had just been downstairs and had caught a glimpse of the movie playing on the television. The movie playing was "Failure to launch" with Matthew McConaughey. Have you ever seen it? It was made in 2006, and it was absolutely terrible. I view it as an embarrassment to all careers involved. Ugh. However...and this is a big however...it is now 2014, and Matthew McConaughey just won his first Oscar for "Dallas Buyers Club." It took dozens of bad or so-so movies, and a few great ones I must admit, for this man to finally earn a title he has probably coveted his entire acting career. Perhaps our lives are like his acting career. We might make a few bad moves. We might feel completely stagnant and unemployable so to speak. But Mr. McConaughey didn't give up. And directors didn't give up on him. He just kept making movies until he won the golden statue. We too shouldn't give up on ourselves or others, and maybe we will hold our own personalized golden statue someday. (Is this too far of a stretch?! You should just know how much I love Matthew McConaughey because I really do. Alright, alright, alright.)
The myriad of trials so many of my friends are facing is vast--from losing a child to watching a loved one choose unknown paths, from a complete lack of confidence to never-ending feelings of guilt, from working too much and missing out on their kids' lives to being a stay-at-home-mom feeling pulled in every direction. My friends have often reached out for help, and I have done all within my power to guide them toward the dim light that is burning faintly in their dark tunnels.
However, I feel the need to redefine my role as a friend. I will always willingly give whatever advice I may be inspired with, but more than advice, I will always give my love. I believe we could all do that a little more.
What are your thoughts?
Labels: rich discussions